The normal rules do not apply
What is ‘normal’? I find this an interesting question because what is one person’s ‘normal’ can very much be someone else’s ‘abnormal’. I saw Vivienne Porritt give a fantastic TEDx where she said normal is a setting on a washing machine so the word should be banned in terms of describing people; instead, we should celebrate and value what each unique person has to offer.
Daily, we’re adjusting to all this and for each one of us, there are different challenges we face and we will all think, feel and act differently - our own version of ‘normal’.
Many are being furloughed, therefore earning less than they are used to, unless their employer is generously making up the difference; some have lost their job – their company simply cannot keep their footing in these uncertain times; there are those on zero contract hours and their employer has had to put things on hold, so therefore they...
Got the time
The situation we find ourselves in will continue for the foreseeable future so we have two choices: to feel hopeless, anxious and adrift or to be bold, step up and make what we can of it all.
These are unprecedented times. This is brand new to all of us and discombobulation is probably a very common feeling. However, rather than continue to feel like things are spiralling downwards beyond your control, anchor yourself in the here and now; use the time to think about what you want to achieve.
Unless a key worker or working from home, you will have a lot of spare time on your hands. The question is, how will you choose to use it? Will you get to the end of all this and have ticked off a list, achieved a big goal or maybe whiled away the hours going through boxset after boxset?
How many times do we wish we had spare time to sit and be, to reflect on our life so far and to think about what we want for our future? Rather than rushing here, there and everywhere, the hamster...
I write this blog fresh from a Joe Wicks PE workout. Was I big advocate of his fitness and food advice before lockdown? No. My fitness routine was a daily dog walk – a brisk dog walk but that was it. There’s the usual hurrying and scurrying that goes with being a working Mum of three but there’s not a kettle bell in sight.
However, in these COVID-19 lockdown times, I find myself craving structure and the Joe Wicks PE Workout provides that. It gets me and my girls in the right mindset to start the day and gives us a fab rush of endorphins to gain a sense of positivity – something greatly needed at the moment.
Up until now, I haven’t written a blog about the current situation which globally, we all face. I felt it important to change the focus, to give readers a brief respite from it all. However, I feel now, as we enter the second week of lockdown in the UK, it’s like the elephant in the room. The effects of this situation ripple...
When the game plan goes to pot
I came across an article recently about the psychology of choking – or to put it another way - when someone loses their nerve. This is the essence of performance psychology and is widely studied in the world of sport but is relevant to so many other areas where we’re ‘performing’, such as job interviews, public speaking, or presentations. What makes our endeavours a success but equally, what can stand in our way?
Most often, the problem is not the ability – you’ve no doubt mastered the skill or technique after many many hours of practise; the problem is nerve – you’re in the moment and although you might have honed your skills and you’ve the knowledge to get through it, your mindset causes you to falter and perhaps, to put it nicely, you blow it.
We have seen examples of this in the world of sport. Stuart Pearce and Chris Waddle missed their spot-kicks during the Italian World Cup in 1990, meaning...
The grass is always greener
My two eldest have mobile phones and after a few months of being given them, my husband and I allowed them to have a profile on a social media platform. I ensure we have regular conversations about e-safety, boundaries such as no phones at the table, switching phones off when they go to bed, family time with no devices etc. We also talk about the upsides and the downsides of social media – how it can raise awareness of social issues, help people connect if they feel isolated and it can enhance learning by getting knowledge from renowned experts and professionals. However, it’s also understanding that just because something is on social media, it isn’t always factual, that people can be keyboard warriors and that very often, we see people’s enhanced highlights but rarely the behind the scenes reality.
I once read an article in The Guardian on the topic of social media and how envy is created around everyone’s seemingly perfect...
Apart from a few propensities we’re born with, a lot of what we’re like as children is down to the influences around us – our parents, family, teachers and friends, as well as the images we see in the media which we either try to relate or aspire to. You often hear parents say: “He’s so forgetful,” or “She’s such a serious little thing, always so responsible,” it’s as if children are being pre-conditioned before they’ve even had a chance to make their own mind up.
With these descriptions permeating the child’s subconscious mind, they’re being defined as a ‘type’ of person, so it’s no wonder they gravitate towards behaviour which reinforces this image of them – it becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy. You hear people saying: “I’m hopeless at planning anything,” or “People say I don’t know how to have fun, I do, it’s just that I always seem to be the...
Same place, different map
An interesting thing happened recently which illustrated personal responsibility, values, Mental Maps, Beachball and all manner of other Winning Edge concepts.
There’s a furniture shop recommended to me by a friend, which is not far from where I live. They sell sofas which are in the main, from an online retailer which is expensive and for good reason. This shop however, sells these sofas at a significantly discounted price but the turnaround is pretty quick; if you see a sofa you like, it’s best not to dilly dally in your decision-making because it’s unlikely to be there the next week.
We’ve been back and forth several times, seen two sofas we like, couldn’t decide there and then and learnt our lesson. We have bought some dining table chairs from there though, so I considered ourselves valued customers. Clearly, we’re not.
The last time we went to the shop, we were looking at bar stools and my daughters were trying them...
Change is as good as a rest
My husband recently showed me a clip from the film Jabberwocky – a 70’s British fantasy comedy film, co-written and directed by Terry Gilliam and starring Michael Palin. The clip I watched showed a backhanded working practice to which Palin’s character suggested a shortcut, to help improve efficiency. Absolute chaos ensued when a small tiny part of the process was changed and the whole workplace fell into disarray. It’s worth watching the clip – it had me in hysterics!
I mused that many workplaces view change like this – ‘if it ain’t broke, don’t fix it’ – keep on keeping on because it all works as it is and if you try to change it, surely it will all go to pot. I know I have worked in some organisations over the years who have this attitude - they have cumbersome work practices and processes which have been the same way for years and there’s the attitude that if it works, why change...
Play it again Sam
Chi-chi Nwanoku has a very interesting story as to how she became an internationally renowned double bass player.
Nwanoku, the eldest of five siblings from hardworking Nigerian and Irish parents, fell in love with playing music at an early age. At seven years old, whilst round a neighbour’s house, Nwanoku heard someone playing the Boogie Woogie 12-bar blues and insisted she be taught the song. Every day she’d return to play until in the end, the neighbours wheeled the instrument to Nwanoku’s house and said she could have it as a gift. Clearly her talent, dedication and determination were obvious, and Nwanoku’s dedicated parents worked overtime to pay for piano lessons.
Chi-chi Nwanoku’s talents didn’t end there. At the age of 8, she was spotted by an athletics coach and started training as a 100-metre sprinter. She describes the feeling of running fast as being ‘free as a bird’. And Nwanoku was fast. She excelled in...
You don’t bring me flowers (except when it’s 14th February)
Apparently, February is the month of lurve… Personally, I am a real humbug when it comes to Valentines Day. I don’t see why we need a specific date to remind us that we need to tell people how much we love them. Why do we not show this love and affection to our loved ones all the year round? Are they not worthy of this? And if your significant other needs a special date as a reminder to tell you how much they love you, does it not rather take the shine off – because you know they’re only doing it because they’ve had a massive prod from Clinton Cards/supermarket displays/Funky Pigeon.com/Interflora and all other retailers who capitalise on the fact there’s a special day to say ‘ps I love you’.
I like to think I give thought to and make the time to show my appreciation and love to my family and friends all year round (I sound such a goody two shoes and obviously my...